Good morning. The scent that is in the air tells us that spring is very near, and I am all for it! I long not only for the relief that comes to us from the end of winter weather woes (say that three times as fast as you can), but also for the change from the dull colors of white, black, grey, and brown that are the mainstay in the upper Midwest for about half of the year, to the vibrant colors of new life that are ours each spring. I can’t wait to see green grass and fresh new leaves!
I have mentioned this classic old movie before, but I would like to do so again: The Wizard of Oz. One of the creative genius aspects of The Wizard of Oz that was lost on me the first few times that I saw the movie, because I always viewed it on black and white TV, was the way Kansas was filmed in black and white but once Dorothy made her way, “over the rainbow,” Oz was shot in that wonderful new technology called “Technicolor.” Once in OZ, everything and everyone was viewed in brilliant full color.
That is how God wants us to consider our world, in brilliant, full color, joyful tones. But we all know that this isn’t always the case.
I think that when we lose someone dear to us it is like going from full vibrant color in life to suddenly seeing everything in a dull black and white. Grief may cause the color to drain out of our life for a while. It is much more difficult to feel joyful, excited, or even happy when our lives are suddenly centered upon a feeling of loss. We need to remember that grief is not a weakness, nor is it in any way connected to anything that is wrong or inappropriate. Jesus wept (John 11:35) as He approached the tomb of His friend Lazarus.
I have, through the years, counseled many wonderful Christian people who felt that their grief was somehow wrong because they knew that the loved one that had passed away was a person of genuine faith. No, it is right that we grieve. Grief is a part of our Father’s plan for our healing when life’s colors seem to fade. God will always love us through the process, but we must remember to call on Him, and to do so as often as is needed.
Psalm 119:28 tells us: My soul melts away from sorrow; strengthen me according to your word!
The truth of God’s love, care, and victory over death are abundantly made clear in His Word. We rejoice in scriptures of victory, such as these from 1 Corinthians 15:25-26 that speak of Jesus’ victory over death: For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death. and verses 54-55: “Death is swallowed up in victory.” “O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”
How do we make these promises of victory so real in our lives that the color returns in full vibrancy? Please consider a few steps that I have found personally helpful:
1. Be thankful. Give thanks for every memory of blessing, of happiness, and of joy. When the colors fade and it feels as though grief is robbing you: remember. All that is best, all that was wonderful about them, take a moment to remember.
2. Don’t go it alone. We are God’s gift to one another. It is tempting to pull the shades and sit in the gloom, but that is not the answer. Go out, and invite people in. Find reasons together to laugh, and perhaps even to cry.
3. Pray. I know, that seems like such a given that we don’t need to mention it, but if you have gone through grief or are going through grief, you know that prayer is often a casualty. We don’t feel like talking…not even with God. But that is not the path to healing! So, pray!
4. Celebrate life, love, and eternity. I don’t mean that you quietly think of such things, I mean that you find someone to bring along and you get out there and celebrate! God is here for you. God’s promises are yours. God’s love is your strength. In honor of your God, celebrate! For the precious times you shared, celebrate!
5. Give it away. Your love, your hope, your expectations of God’s care, your memories that are most dear, your talents and your energies…give them away! When we give generously, we receive generously.
6. Do not be afraid. Fear is the work of the enemy, so don’t let him in. You will win. With the help of your Lord and the love of His children, you will win this battle.
7. Look for the colors. They are still there. The only thing that has changed is your heart. Look for the brilliant colors of life with your lord and rejoice in them.
May our Lord always bless us, especially when we feel those moments of loss.
Vern